You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
