I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I think a kid would responsible me up
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
