Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
