just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
