Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
