the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
