Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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