you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
