How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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