you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
