fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
