Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
