I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
