HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
The beer is more important than you right now.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
