He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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