Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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