my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
