I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I'm at about main and main street
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
