So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
