Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
