So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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