the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
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