We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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