Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Randomize
