Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
