yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
