I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
