pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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