I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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