I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Randomize
