What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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