the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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