Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
