sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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