return my video game
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
