Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
you inspire me to be a worse person
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
