You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
