Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
