This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
