Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
