Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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