I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
