All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Your mouth is God's brothel.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Randomize
