I think I am morally bankrupt
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
