You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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