Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
