that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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