Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
