I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
