Yo dont text me then not text me
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
