Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
